A Wigwam for a Goose's Bridle

I just have to let God

love me. How hard can it be?

Harder than you think!

But I… No buts.

Because I… no, not because of me at all; because of Him.

OK then, what is this Love?

This Love is becoming my King

and fighting my battles

because I cannot take on Satan.

I would lose.

I have lost.

I am lost.

Until I find Jesus who is the truth and the way.

This Love is the agony in the garden.

Why are you not crying yet? He is!

This Love is the scourging and the crown of thorns –

in my place, instead of me,

though the fault was all mine, still is all mine.

Is your heart so hardened?

You’re looking for distractions because you know how this story goes.

You know He carries that cross on His already broken body.

You know He falls.

You know He is nailed to that tree and hung up to asphyxiate.

But you, you’re breathing just fine.

Because you let your mind

wander

so you

don’t have

to focus in

too closely on the blood,

the tears,

the pain,

the death

that, by all rights,

belong to you.

You earned them!

Remember that?

But you don’t really want to,

so you sit here

glossing over the gory details

and thinking in second person,

because writing this in the first person would be, well, just too

personal.

He loves you.

Let Him love you.

Focus for one minute, if you can bear it, on any of those wounds or insults.

Sometimes a minute is a long time.

I’ll wait.

Attention span of a gnat.

Getting closer.

Focus.

So much static in the mind.

So much clutter in the heart.

Even right here, right now,

detracting from Him.

Imperfect intentions.

Could you just stop for even a

moment?

Just let Him love you.

Just let Him love

me.

He loves me.

I am unworthy.

He loves me.

I have nothing to offer.

He loves me.

Even now, some piece of my soul

is probably planning

its next betrayal.

He loves me.

I let Him love me.

I will never deserve this.

I will never be enough.

I don’t have to be enough.

He is sufficient for us both

if I just let Him love me.